


A Distant Memory

by Avistella



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Family, Gen, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-30
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:09:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22473124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avistella/pseuds/Avistella
Summary: Arun thinks back to his brother's disappearance.
Kudos: 3





	A Distant Memory

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hanae (Toyhou.se)](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Hanae+%28Toyhou.se%29).



> Commission for [Hanae at Toyhou.se](https://toyhou.se/hanae) featuring their characters, [Arun](https://toyhou.se/137445.-tjb-arun-) and Amaris (mentioned).

Night had already fallen, but I still found myself awake and taken in with my thoughts. I sat on the bed, the mattress dipping underneath my weight. In my hand was one of my most treasured items—a photo of my family. My _entire_ family from when we were all still living together.

I found myself staring at it every now and then, often remembering with a bittersweetness the days of my past. Despite myself, I ended up staring at my brother's youthful face in the photograph, capturing what was now nothing more than a distant memory to me. It was a stark difference from the face as the one I had seen in the newspapers, but even though he looked different now, I still knew that it was him. There was no way I would mistake my brother for someone else.

My brows furrowed, and I found myself no longer able to keep my emotions in check. They came in tides and waves, all at once and unrelenting. They came to me in the form of questions and doubts to the relationship that I thought we had.

Why didn't Amaris say anything when he left? Why didn't he tell me? Did he hate the life we led? It was true that life on the farm was gruelling work, but those peaceful days were so precious to me, and I believed that he felt the same way.

Or... maybe it was _us_ that he hated? Did I delusion myself into thinking that we were close when we were younger? We always played together and laughed together. Sure, we had the occasional arguments, but that was normal between siblings. Maybe I was just seeing what I wanted to see.

...Yeah, now that I think about it clearly, I was usually the one dragging him around with me and pulling him along, wasn't I? Maybe Amaris was fed up with me which is why he decided to leave our family without a word or even so much as a hint on where to find him.

I exhaled a sigh, my shoulders sagging with the weight of my emotions. Admittedly, I was still bitter about the whole thing. I was angry and frustrated, and the betrayal I felt that day still lingers in my heart and stings every now and then. And yet, despite all that, I couldn't bring myself to be angry at Amaris. At least, not completely.

I thought that perhaps the pain he had caused me would be enough for me to hate him and view him as a stranger, but that wasn't the case. In spite of everything, Amaris was still family. _My_ family. He was still my brother, even if he himself didn't believe himself to be. And I... I could never stay angry at my family, no matter what. Even if I tried to, in the end, I love my family beyond what could be described with words alone.

My eyes glanced towards the time, and I breathed out another sigh. There was no point in me losing sleep over this. I've already had my fair share of sleepless nights in the past lamenting about what happened with Amaris.

I went through the usual motions of safely tucking away the photo in its proper place for the night before settling myself into bed. How many nights had I gone through now, unable to bear the emotions that had consumed me with Amaris' disappearance?

And yet, that night, I dreamt of a sweet memory. I dreamt of a sunny sky stretched out before me as I ran through the tall and grassy fields as a chorus of boyish laughter rung out in the air.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoy my writing, feel free to check out [my Tumblr](https://avistella.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
